A Legacy Letter by Randi Scalise Johnson, MFCC
To My Granddaughter:
I realize now that it is too late, that there are many questions
I have about my grandmother, things I would really like to ask her
about. When I was young I loved my Nona very much and she loved me.
She fussed over me, worried and prayed for me every day. She wanted
to know all about me, my needs, dreams and desires, and I never thought
to ask about her dreams when she was young.
So now I think is a good time to write to you, my future granddaughter,
before I get too busy fussing over you and making sure you have everything
you want and desire once you are born. Now is a good time to tell
you about me, and maybe a little about my Nona, your great grandmother.
Her name was Caterina Scalise. She and my grandfather grew up together
in Castel Silano, a small village in southern Italy. There were not
many jobs there so my grandfather left for America to find work. When
he found work and settled into the Company Town of McCloud he sent
for my grandmother. Her father traveled with her and stayed just long
enough to marry off his daughter before returning to Italy. No one
else in the entire family would ever leave Italy to visit my grandparents
and my grandparents never went back to Italy to visit their familia.
This is a strange concept for me because I was raised that your family
is everything-it's the most important thing in the world, Blood is
Thicker that Water.
Although I love my family and feel a close connection to them, I
often feel closer to my friends and have created my own family with
my husband and children, they are my real family. I love my husband-but
if he wanted to move to a place far away from my friends and family
and where I did not want to go, I would not go. I would expect where
we live to be a joint decision. If either of my children were to come
to me and say that they have decided to move to Italy or Norway or
any other country I would be sad to not live close or help raise you,
my granddaughter. But that is a choice my children may make in the
future. I only wish them health, happiness in doing work they love
and a partner to share their life dreams with. I know I cannot plan
their lives.
If I could ask my grandmother for advice now I would, for she was
very wise and lived a long full life. She was loving and generous
and I know she would give me good advice. This is what I think she
would tell me and this is what I would like to share with you: Nona
believed, and I do too, that spiritual instruction and a good education
are the best gifts you can give to your children, or to yourself.
No one can ever take your education away from you. By education I
mean the things you actually learn, not just memorize. Nona would
also tell us not to be afraid to take risks in life, to trust our
intuition. When you know you have found someone to love and be loved
by you will absolutely know it. If there is any doubt, trust that
too. Having someone to love throughout a lifetime is the greatest
gift of all. To share the joys of parenthood, and grandparenthood.
I believe Nona was happiest when her home was full of her children
and their children and we were all laughing and eating and just being
together. I was usually in the kitchen with my Nona. She loved to
cook and was the best cook in the world! My grandfather was usually
in the garden-he grew every fruit and vegetable imaginable in his
plot that was in back of their small house in Richmond. When I was
a child there was no place more special on earth than being in that
garden or in my Nona's kitchen.I hope that some day you will learn
to grow a garden with me, and will help me in the kitchen. That way
we'll have the time to get to know each other, even if we don't know
all the details. And most of all, I hope and pray that you will be
lucky in love like she was and as I have been blessed.
Randi Scalise Johnson, MFCC
